The only person I’ve been kissing lately is my dog. And I guess that technically doesn’t count because it’s not a person.
So let me be clear on one thing – I AM happy. I’m not writing these series of posts to prove that I’m happy to anyone. If you are somehow involved in my life right now, you’ll just know. My life is on a positive path and I’m working hard to achieve my goals. Yes, I’m happy.
And surprise, surprise. I’m happy even if I’m NOT dating! (Say whaaat?!)
So I was inspired to write about this topic because I just got into a little squabble with a dear friend of mine. I was asking him for help to try to decode this text message I got from a guy and we got into conversation about dating. Specifically, he was asking me why I wouldn’t give this guy a chance and that I should start casually dating again. I, on the other hand, have a different viewpoint on all that.
Yes, I have standards. They’re not unbelievably high or anything, but I have standards. I say this a lot, but I guess people don’t really get it: I know what I want. So if I know what I want, why should I go on dates with people that I don’t want to know on that intimate level? I’m not saying I don’t want to be friends with them. Of course we can be friends! But why would I go on a date with someone who’s interested in me if I’m not interested back? Wouldn’t that be what we call, “a pity date?” I’m pretty damn sure no guy would be delighted to know that the only reason a girl is going out with him is out of pity.
Also, I’m not saying I absolutely don’t care about what this guy has to say. Like I said, I’m totally down with being friends! FRIENDS. Meaning, yeah we can hang out in a group setting with OTHER FRIENDS. But don’t expect me to hang out with you in a one-on-one setting anytime soon.
Here’s what makes me mad. Why is it when a girl has standards she’s considered a bitch, but when she has virtually no standards she’s considered easy?
UGH! It just doesn’t make sense! So if I didn’t have any standards and just went out with every guy who was interested, you can’t fcking tell me that you and everyone else wouldn’t look at that and go “Damn, homegirl’s thirsty!” But lo and behold, the moment I’m just trying to play it cool and just not date around because I really, truly just wanna do me right now, people are like “Why you got a stick up your ass?!”
It’s just not fair. It’s like girls can’t ever win this stupid, imaginary debate. And if you’re wondering if I’m implying there’s a double standard… HELL YEAH I’m implying that! You can’t tell me that if you saw a happy, single guy who was busy doing his own shit and chasing his dreams, you would find that attractive. Everyone would be all over him. And then when he’s trying to talk to multiple girls at once, everyone’s like “Damn homie! Look at you playing the field!”
Why can’t I fucking play the field? Why can’t I just do my own thing and if I happen to meet someone that I’m interested in, I’ll date him then? Why do I have to be dating around right now just to be accepted in society as “happy?” Why can’t people believe me when I say I’m fine just doing me right now?
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On a personal note – SORRY I went on hiatus without letting you guys know! 😦 Life just got busy and I didn’t really have time to sit down and blog. But I’m back and I’ll be blogging more often (I PROMISE!) In case you guys miss my shenanigans, please follow me on all my social networks! I’m on everything – Facebook, Twitter, Vine, Instagram, even Google+! (Even though no one knows what the fck that is, haha.)
Thanks for all your support! I’ll see you guys soon!
-Ally
The people you value and respect will understand that you are making the best choices for you. The ones who don’t, don’t matter.
Thank you for your kind words. You are absolutely right. 🙂